It has been more than a few days since last I put more than simple words here and the time to reflect has been good.
New friends have been made, information learned and even some of it applied.
This life I am living is mine. It is not an audition for my "real" life. There is no practice run. This is not simply training for a "free trial". It is my life.
Reflecting back on some of the years has been good and also bad at times. It is hard to walk forward while looking backwards. Believe me...I have tried.
Simple times in coffee shop and wandering the fall streets of Kansas City, working on art and writing, and studying strangers has let me become re- acquainted with the amazing person I used to be, before the cares of life, the weight of years and drudgery of labor began forcing my soul into a thin place that I called reality. I am still me! Under neath it all is still the boy wanderer, adventurer and silly goof that never ceased to amaze. In finding myself once again as a man, I have connected to that kid inside and figured out, it is ok to have fun!
When did I become so stern, so serious, so absorbed in the distant future that I stopped living now the way I once did? I ceased being present. I stopped sitting at stoplights until the moon rose over light pole, listening to August and Everything After, just because I could. I stopped flying kites on afternoons and walking chickens. I stopped climbing buildings, singing at the moon, dancing in the rain and playing piano in empty ballrooms! When is the last time I dive rolled at a stranger and ran off with random idiots to Chicago? It's time to get back to the nonsense that made me smile on an endless basis. Free to be me, not an idea or imitation of myself!
I am listening to my thoughts. Living out my desires. Throwing the weight of others eyes away and simple running through the leaves, scuffing my feet as I go and spinning around in art galleries when I want to! This is my life, I chose to live it.
And it's going to kick so much ass!
Again!
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