Wrestling

So it is almost 3 am on Sunday morning and for some odd reason I am awake again. I think my sleep schedule is a bit messed up as I try to recover from 6 months of waking at this time in the morning like clockwork. Today is time for church and friends so I do hope to sleep a bit more before it is time to head into the city.

Yesterday went well, simple and uneventful really. Spent some time thinking about Friday night. My friend Brian took me to a play he has been working on called "The Wrestling Season" and I have to admit, we were both moved to tears by the opening nights performance. The pic to the right is Sam and Tosin, two of the local actors in the play. Such strong themes and issues about the things people say and think about others, how that controls how we view ourselves and how hurtful or helpful words can be. I certainly identified strongly with one of the characters and loved how at the end of the performance a forum was opened to everyone in the audience to share their thoughts, ideas and emotions about what the performance meant to them. Powerful stuff indeed. The entire play takes place on a wrestling mat, in a ring, with all the actors wearing wrestling singlets, guys and girls except for the referee. They will be going on tour to local high schools and colleges and I truly hope the message that they are carrying will be received and heeded. To see the pain, anguish, hurt and confusion that rumors and words can create really tore my heart out all over again.

Afterwards we attended the reception, met his friends and the actors and then watched a spoof of the entire performance put on in the same theater by a local high school drama club and laughed our asses off. It really did help alleviate the tension felt by so many. The people that shared after the performance in the forum were so varied. From elderly men and women to young teenagers in middle school, we heard so much. It was certainly good art and I know we all left a bit changed and challenged to think. The third act occurs in the car on the way home.

But speaking of wrestling...that is what I have been doing lately, with myself, with my friends, with Michael, with Brian and I guess with faith. I don't have a lot of clarity yet but I believe I am finding my way. None of this is easy. Change for me is always hard. I thought I had things figured out as they would be, but each day is showing me that moving in a direction, down a path towards something, never looks like the map. It is its own journey and experience and we cannot often predict what others responses may be. The good thing is, through this all, I am still communicating with those I love and those that love me. I am just unable to see around this next bend in the road less traveled and I am beginning to get a bit anxious about it.

I will lay down for a bit now I suppose and then get up and go to church. Prolly will head back to JW this Sunday, as the Cause is getting to wear a bit thin. I really am not a fan of pretend anything and if push comes to shove, I just won't go anywhere at all. So until later, ciao.

daemon