The art of being me...

Woke up this morning in rare form to the sounds of enormous thunder and lightening! Not such an auspicious sign for the weekend, but it looks like the storms have passed at the moment. Checked out the forecast for our camping area and it looks to be a bit better than predicted! I am slowly gathering my thoughts and assembling all the things that I may need over the course of the next three days. Hopefully David will find a ride, as I will be unable to taxi him around and I also know that I need these driving times to myself. I cannot bear the thought of sharing my solitude with him at the moment and in a different, though good mood.

What to make of this life at the moment? I threw up some art that I enjoy by an amazing designer from earlier last century. His images of males and clothing have always brought a smile to this boys face and I encourage you to check out his work. He certainly captured an era of style and grace that I would have loved to lived in.

My odd title today just kind of popped into my head, like they always do, and it certainly has me puzzled at the moment. What is my nature and what is the "art" of being Daemon mean to me? I love my style, my mind, my passions, all of these observable and contrary things that assemble themselves into myself and how I present and am perceived by others. Ephemeral and esoteric to be sure, but not cryptic to myself and the space I inhabit inside of this body I call my own.

The art of being Daemon means, never being at a loss for words, a quick smile, a quirky ensemble of activities and strange grace that seems to follow me, even at my worst moments. I love this life I have and greet each day with the hope and comfort of knowing that I get to do it all over again! I love being me!

Music and words...these things I place together into some semblance of a picture, but each person I meet, even those that know me well, always feel in some way that they are meeting me once again for the first time. It is not that I change so much daily, but merely that I offer yet another facet to the light, seeking for acceptance, hoping for love and longing to be seen and known for who I truly am. While we all fall back at times on patterns of behavior, I seem to start each day at another jumping off point that seems to baffle and confuse those new in my life.

If you can imagine a little kid, living the best imitation of himself, with all the responsibilities neatly tucked away, all his shit in order, but with some carelessness and silliness always present, than you would have a good picture of me, I guess? It is not always so easy to aim that narrow and fine beam of perception of life at myself and not come away with a different reflection at least every five minutes or so. It is not that I defy description, but merely that I don't think about it all that much.

I see myself as a small person, though my frame and stature belie that notion. I sometimes forget this and pick people up when I hug them, and never quite understand how this startles them so? I guess the body that others see me in, does not fit the mental construct of how I perceive myself. All the talents and skills that I take for granted, almost as inconsequential as my eye color, seem to entrance and entertain others. How have those people NOT managed to make their lives as diverse and well rounded as myself? How can one not be interesting even to oneself? How on earth do people ever find themselves in a place of boredom when there is a whole mind, world and other people to explore? That baffles me.

Make your life rich. Seize each moment. Live in high gear but pause and reflect when needed. All kinds of thoughts are bouncing around in my head, but I feel the need to shower and shave before this day truly starts. The air outside smells fresh, the windows are thrown open to a sweet spring rain and everywhere I look I see lush, verdant green. It is going to be a great weekend!

So the art of being me? It changes moment by moment. I am always entranced by that guy I see in the mirror. Not in some Narcissus slant or angle, but more of a questing hopefulness that that guy there will like me, tell me it's all okay again and that this amazing journey will never cease. He changes with time, like we all do, but he keeps smiling. Those eyes have greeted each day for all these years and have never lost their twinkle or spark. He loves. I love.

And that is what makes this life expansive, rich, varied, bright and joyous.

What life picture are you painting?

Make your life beautiful!