I am reluctantly writing this. I have had no words to share lately. Almost reclusive in my own musings and thoughts I have been. Nothing of import or newsworthy to share seems to be the order of the day.It is not that life is not happening. I am throwing myself into work even more and those tasks are now taking up six days a week of my time. There has been some employee turnover (for the best) there so my responsibilities and obligations have increased. I feel weary a lot due to these changes.
I celebrated my birthday this last week and it was amazing. We had dinner as a family at one of my favorite restaurants and they really blew me away with the thoughtful and generous gifts I received. I have never been one to make much ado over a birthday, much less request gifts, so I was really moved. They discerned two costly things I had saved for but never purchased for myself (cause I am strange like that) and went out of their way to buy them for me. I am happy with a card and a few dollars each year, so quite simply, I was stunned. I still am not sure what to think about that.
See? I just don't have that stream of consciousness moving at the moment to write on about what is going on in my life. It is possibly a combination of working too hard, much on my mind and the slow effects of winter, my least favorite season of the year.
Things are going well. I have my patterns and routine, though even these are changing. I work. I relax. Repeat as often as necessary. Even getting this many words out has been an effort. It is just where I am at lately. I am keeping my own company and treasuring my quiet and alone times more. I read. I practice piano. I work on my projects. Right now is a solitary time and I cannot say that I miss the people. I see enough of them at work. I have cycles where I retreat back into myself and this is one of them.
Does anyone else experience these ebbs and flows in social activity? I am exhausted after all the holidays, activities and end/turn of the year events. I just enjoy my quiet now. Even here.
daemon
I often go through these cycles. I've went through months (literally) not really wanting to be around anyone, and not being around anyone much. Then I've experienced the opposite as well. It's not that I'm unsociable, or that I don't enjoy being around people. I just like my alone time sometimes much more than time spent around others. And I'll admit, there are times when I just don't feel like being around others or being sociable--sometimes that just sort of drains me somehow and seems to do more harm to me than good. But I do try, most of the time, to find a nice balance between the two.
ReplyDeleteBeen there. Done that.
ReplyDeleteIn 2011 I bought 46 acres of land in Wyoming. I am so looking forward to building my house and enjoying the tranquility of the open space. My peace and happiness comes not from others but from myself.
I respect the silence and enjoy the you time.
Will catch up with you when you return.