Monday, July 2, 2012

I'm not a slut anymore

Yeah, weird title I know, but this thought really just occurred to me. I woke up, took a piss, washed my face, looked outside, read up on my news, looked some other blogs on my feed, skimmed some random crap theology thing and decided I don't care anymore and then realized...I am not a slut anymore.

Just tripping back through some time here, the last guy I slept with was my boyfriend. Jumping back before him, also my boyfriend. I know my memory isn't the best, but I honestly haven't hooked up with a friend or some guy I met since, well I am not sure? I remember the last three guys I have dated. I can see their faces, bodies and cocks in my mind and I honestly am trying to remember anyone in between and I can't really recall. I am not saying it hasn't happened but it really doesn't jump into my mind. I am sure one of my friends will read this and remind me of someone or some night that I have forgotten, and I will have to eat some of my words, but I really have cooled it down on being a man whore. When did this happen?

For example, I am single right now, have been for a while and haven't hooked up with anyone, not even one of my FWB's. I have had other things on my mind. My life has been fill of other things, activities and people besides potential sex partners. I still think about and talk about sex a lot, but I don't spend my free time hunting it. I am not really looking for a relationship either, which is another odd though that just occurred to me. I used to abhor the idea of being alone, not being in a relationships and sharing my life with another guy I cared about and who cared for me, but now, I am okay with just myself, walking this road life thing.

I used the word "anymore" instinctively in my title because I know I used to be a slut. I really did nail, or get nailed, by just about anyone that caught my eye and a weeks full of adventures was always a great diversion and past time. I wasn't interested in a relationship with them and just was enjoying sampling my way through all the different guys that came across my life. Blowing off steam, I guess? Having a great time, for sure. I would settle down when I found someone that I liked for a while, but always picked back up where I left off, when those relationships ended. I certainly don't want to talk numbers or details, that wouldn't paint me in a good light, but reality and truth is what it is. A day usually doesn't go by when I am out and about in my city that I don't see at least one guy I have slept with. I don't kiss and tell. Maybe that is one of the reason's I pulled so much tail? Whoever they were knew I was down to fuck and play without the strings of relationship or disclosure. What happened between us stayed with us, unless we pulled in someone else to share. It's not like I was sleeping with total strangers.

Okay, this post is going nowhere good fast, but what can I expect with this kind of title? The truth is, I have been a slut. I am also not saying I won't be a slut again. That usually has been my pattern since High School when I am single. I really don't know what the future holds, but I highly doubt that I will. Should the title read, "I'm not a slut right now"? I dunno...

I really don't have anything else on my mind but there ya go. That is what popped into my head. This is what I shared. Even when I don't like what I write, I should get back to sharing this kind of stuff again. It gets it out of my head and is a more authentic and raw slice of my life. Sorry guys, I am not a slut anymore/right now. I think I am good with that.

What the hell is going on with me?

daemon

3 comments:

  1. Maturing to a higher state of mind - seeking quality over instant gratification.

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  2. Hey, nothing wrong with being a slut anyway. Or being celibate or anything in between the two, for that matter. It's all a question of what you want.

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  3. UMMM. you seem to be developing "perspective." it's a sign of maturity as Max says.

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