Monday, February 25, 2013

Reflection before the storm

I slept for twelve hours last night and woke up this morning to the sounds of silence. A rather far cry from the usual bustle and hectic pace that my life has been these past few months. I have to say, I rather enjoyed it. A deep snow still blankets the trees and land in my neighborhood and the only faint sounds I can hear now are the small birds chirping while fluffing themselves into feathery balls in the evergreen hedges around the house. My grandfather clock chimes the hour and like clockwork the coffee machine clicks on dutifully to fill the house with the cozy smell of freshly brewed coffee.

Lately, I have not made much time for myself to sit, muse and write here about the happenings in my life or the thoughts and questions in my head. A good habit formed is just as easy to break with the small steps of simple neglect. Putting something good off is just a poor practice for me as indulging in wasteful or illogical behavior and I have been remiss in cultivating my inner life shared. There is something cathartic about getting my thoughts out in word form to be perused and reflected on. Even my frequent writing in my own private journals has stalled out, due to the hours I have been investing in work and rest. I guess there is a certain ebb and flow to our own lives that changes with each season we find ourselves passing through.

Winter has always found me a bit more solitary. I have my fill of people, activity and energy in my daily work cooking for people and events and with the hours I have been putting in, once I leave, I am more prone to enjoying the time I do have with myself. I have some incredible friends who have known me through the years and understand that my involvement socially tends to alter itself with the pace of each year. Spring, summer and fall is my forte while these cold months tend to nudge me back into the quiet places of my own heart. It is not an unreasonable arrangement and quite necessary for my own peace of mind. They know that all too soon, with the warmth and sun, I will be back out and about enjoying the people, crowds, places and events that I retreated from for a while.

Thanks to the insight of my GM at work, I have been granted two whole days off to rest and recharge my batteries and body. We have another storm coming and Kyle, our Executive Chef, has "volunteered" to stay at the hotel in my stead to feed the hungry travelers and coworkers who will be overnighting till the worst has passed. I am very grateful. It looks like we have a few hours this day before the snow arrives and I am going to make good use of the freedom and time I do have. Last night I watched a good independent film (The Reader) and baked some Pumpkin Spiced Gingerbread to share with friends and family. After I quit my writing here, I am going to get cleaned up, drink some more coffee and then bundle up to deliver some loaves to my parents, my neighbor Bernice and my friends Troy and Bruce. A home made treat is always a great way to share some love. For me, cooking and sharing with others is my way of saying that I care about them and have been thinking of them in my absence. I think I can just make all the rounds around the city before this afternoon.

I realize I have not shared much about my own inner monologue or the questions and ideas that have been steeping in my mind. There is always much going on in my head but I think the things that I am pondering and wondering about can hold their peace until I have arrived at more concrete answers or at least more well formed questions to broach the silence and invite discussion. There have been few other times in my own introspective life where I have been challenged as much or seen such evident changes occur in such a short time. I am growing. I can feel it. I think that is a good thing. Take care and keep warm. Until later,


1 comment:

  1. Yes I agree with you sometimes we just get to caught up in a fast paced life we forget to stop, listen, contemplate and enjoy life.