Monday, October 29, 2012

Random bits

I have two day off in a row. A first in a long while. I got to sleep in for a few extra hours and now find myself musing about what to write. I cannot decide on a topic so will this will prolly just take the form of a few disjointed paragraphs about the things that are on my mind. Here we go...

This morning I woke at 5 am with the thoughts of a strange and unsettling dream fading from my mind. Without going into all the strange details, I will try to summarize it simply. I went to my usual club to meet friends after work and decompress. When I walked in, my Dad was there at the bar talking to Danny my bartender and all of my friends. I wasn't sure what to make of it, but introduced him to them all. It wasn't awkward exactly but rather a collision of worlds. He was in "my" space and getting to know all the guys who have made up the fabric of my life for the last several years. Names he had heard were being put with faces and it was good for them to get to know him and more of where I come from. The dream ended oddly with my Dad having another stroke and I could only watch as they loaded him up in the ambulance. I wanted to ride to the hospital with my Mom, (who kind of just appeared) but for some reason she could not hear me when I was talking to her. I can still see all those images in my mind, even now, over an hour later. Unsure what to make of that?

The first thing I read on my Twitter feed this morning from a friend was, "We have to put effort into being honest, truthful and compassionate towards others." This made me think and consider the things that I choose to do each day and the person that others encounter when they meet me. It inspired me to be more intentional and present to those meetings. Making space and room in my life and perspective to live and consider others is something I could definitely work on and benefit from. I love it when little bits of wisdom just jump out and stab me in the eyes and heart.

This is a picture I ran across on one of my favorite websites this morning. Gentlemint At first, as a gay guy, I was struck by how handsome the young man was but then was even more surprised to learn that it is an early photo of  John Wayne. When I hear that name, a certain image and impression jumps into my minds eye and this picture is certainly NOT it. What I took away from this chance encounter was that each of us on this earth have been young once. We have each been all of the different preceding ages that come before the one we currently have. In our daily lives we meet and know other people who are older or much older than us all and that age and image is what often frames my entire perspective of them as a person. The hard thing to remember is that, all of my older friends and family were my age once and also much younger. I did not know them then and certainly do not know all of the life that they have lived. This challenges me to keep my mind open about who they are now and to ask them about their experience and wisdom. Age is not something that is still valued in this country and in not seeking out the stories of our elders and learning from them, we all miss out on the wealth of their experience as well as the stories of their lives. Everyone was somebody else sometime.

It is time for me to get around some more coffee and to start my day. It is luxurious to still be padding around the house in my flannel pants and a hoodie at 6:30 in the morning. I am going to enjoy these two days off and hope to fill them with good things and people. I am sure I will be back several times to note things down as they come to mind. These few paragraphs just are what happened to be on my mind at the moment. Wherever you are, have a good day.


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