Saturday, June 18, 2011
All over the place
So much seems to change while staying the same in my life. Those who knew me in childhood still find my face familiar and the winding routes I take daily are haunts of former trails I walked and drove while growing up. From the ends of the earth and back to home I find myself. Is anything ever different or like the water falling from the sky, does it simply go round to whence it returned?
I have been writing here for a couple of years and the paths in my mind and heart are familiar to those who have stayed with me and perused these pages over time. The same loops and questions, thoughts and desires are visited again and again. The names and places change over the days, but I am still me. Will anything ever be different or is this my lot in life?
The stirring sounds of bagpipes seem to echo my hearts cry this day and I can sit here while they skreel, lifting almost as if in a prayer my yearning and hope for a brighter tomorrow, a bit of peace and some healing to all these tender and wounded places in my soul. I so long for another day, one not like this day, where my now meets my dreams and I find rest and solace to the ever churning and wanderingness of that part of me that seeks and never seems to find.
For now, I simply let the rain fall and wait.
How long, indeed.
at 4:16 AM